Below are the 5 most recent journal entries recorded in woodeaze's LiveJournal:

Saturday, July 17th, 2004
2:59 pm	The Saga continues, the Wood™ and the Master Muffin squad all up in yo shit Sexy Beast... I met this gal last night and got some digits, she's a seXXXy beast. She's a NewYorcian, meaning she was born and raised in New York. She's pretty bad ass. Anyway so i was hangin out with my buddy from high school who just moved to NYC, now this guy is fuckin brilliant, he just spent 5 years in england, and he's awesome, the only thing is, is that he's a total anglophile, and speaks with a fake british accent. What makes it really bad, is that it's a really bad fake british accent. So right before I'm getting this gals number i'm out side this bar talkin to her friends, and when I go down they're making fun of my friend and his fake british accent. I thought it was pretty funny, guess you had to be there, I'm debating on telling him, HEY! STOP TALKING WITH A FAKE ACCENT YOU FUCK! I mean who the fuck wants to be british anyway, this motherfucker is always talkin about how great they are, and don't get me wrong they are, but seriously they suck. Your Breakfast is MMM MMMM good... So I bitch a lot about my roommate, mainly because he's a lying, thieving, dipshit, bitch ass cock fuck motherfucker. But it never ceases to amaze me how fucked up he really is. So I have been noticing this mouse lately, and it seems that the mouse sht all over the stove, well my roommate woke up this morning and cook himself breakfast, right over mouse shit. I mean c'mon, have some self-respect. (Comment on this)
Thursday, July 15th, 2004
8:02 pm	Things Happen... The Mouse... For the past few days I keep thinking I see something move in the cabinet under the sink where we keep the trash. Sure enough it was a mouse. I found this out when I opened the door and it fell on my foot. Disgusting. It must meet a violent end. The Slap... Last night I hung out with this guy. Now me and this guy have a bit of "history." Understand that he's a bit of an asshole. More like he has a raging ego. One night a few months ago, we were at this bar called 7B, we met these ladies, and I got one of thier numbers. Needless to say he told me promptly the next morning he fucked her. Anyway in my classic way I told him he was a little bitch and we didn't talk for a bit. Anyway he apologized and I figured maybe he didn't know I got the digits, whatever, I put it behind me. He fucked a skank y'know? So I hang out with him last night, now I'm already in a shitty mood. And he decides to keep fuckin' poking at my patience. So at the bar we were at there were these "Miller Lite" sluts, slutty lookin girls tryin to give you Miller Lite, which is a really shitty fuckin beer anyway. So we're talkin to these girls, and one of them seems a bit genuine, and i'm rappin with her, enjoyin myself, meanwhile this guy keeps fuckin with me by pokin at my love handles and swingin his arms in my face.I told him, "Hey don't touch me" and he then goes and grabs my "man boob" so I swing and slap the shit out of him. One hit and he hits the deck. As he was on the floor I said "Understand, Bitch?" And he gets up and is all "ha ha, man," and i'm proned to straight fuck him up if he gave me any shit. I look over and all the girls in the bar are like HOLY FUCK! Anyway he IM'd me todday sayin his ears were ringin and shit. Bottom line, don't fuck with The Wood™. The APT... So I signed the lease of my new pad, 190 Bleeker. And that shit is TIGHT! I can't wait to get away from my mooching ass roommate. So to describe how cool my new place is, I live like 3 doors down from Gwenyth Paltrow, how do I know? Because I saw her sexy ass!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Tuesday, July 6th, 2004
8:50 pm	These Fuckin Songs Ok look I got some beef first of there's this piece of crap Wayne Wonder - Hold Me Now What the fuck is this shit? Then there's this 311 covering the cure and shit Look assholes don't cover the cure, you fuckin dipshits, these are the same dumbasses that "meditate" and fake smokin pot in the same video. fuckin suburban bastards, and please for the love of god don't have a DJ, we know you're white boys from omaha, you're about 25 years too late on the scratchin records thing, fuck nut. (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Saturday, July 3rd, 2004
3:39 am	Tonight It's been years, please please please get out of my heart. (Comment on this)
Wednesday, June 30th, 2004
2:50 am	Spider-Man and my Bitch ass roommate My roommate, who's a asshole. Had a party on last friday (of which I basically cleaned up and moderated) told me I was welcome to any left overs of the party. Well the fuckin asshole just left a note on the fridge telling me to stop eating his food. So I pay this jerk's rent, I wash his dishes and deal with his party and i can't hold him to his word. Big surprise! I went to see Spider-Man, it was ok, whatever, I talked to this lady about art. Okay I'm just gonna end it like this for all you artist out there, if you're going to talk about your art, then your art can not be described as "abstract acrylic." If your gonna bring your guns to the show, you better bring the bullets too, less the wood done shoot you down...like my roommate...when he finds out I ain't payin rent this month...dickface. (2 Comments |Comment on this)